On the heels of news this morning that Starbucks is closing 61 stores in Oz, in addition to the 600 here in the States, comes this amusing conversation I overheard at Einstein Bagels this morning.
Side note: I love Einstein’s coffee, probably a little too much. Their house vanilla blend is addictive. I’ve got the worst sweet tooth. Also, the Einstein I go to every morning for my coffee fix is run by the most hilariously foul-mouthed crew of bagel slicers on the west side.
Shakawniya (yes, that’s her name; it’s on her badge, so shut up): Guuurl, didju hear about Starbucks?
LaNita: Naw, what now?
Shakawniya: They closin’ a bunch mo’ stores.
LaNita: I know that, heifer.
Shakawniya: Naw, more!
LaNita: Where more?
Shakawniya: Australia, girl. They can’t get they shit straight up here, down unda, over here, over there, innywhere!
Chorus of laughter from all Einstein workers.
Shakawniya: Sheeeeeeet. F*ck Starbucks, man!
LaNita: That’s right! F*ck ’em! Who’s next? Whatchoo want on yo’ bagel, baby? We gotcha bagels right here! And yo coffee!
Nothing like a little healthy competition, eh?