FAIL

I’ve fallen off the diet wagon and landed squarely on the FAIL wagon.

Dinner Fail

Welcome to a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day, personified in dinner form, at the she eats. household.

I get points for the mac & cheese being whole grain, right?

…right?

Damn.

Advertisements

Beer-Cheese Bread

I’ve been meaning to post this recipe since I wrote about it last month and, well, I’m scatterbrained.  But a few lovely readers have taken advantage of the shiny, new EMAIL ME! feature to the right to remind me.  Thank you, readers!

So without further ado, I present:

Beer-Cheese Bread
Serves: 6

1 bottle of beer (12 oz)
3 cups self-rising flour (King Arthur makes the best…)
3 tablespoons granulated sugar
4 tablespoons butter (melted, divided into two portions)
1 cup grated or shredded cheese (optional)
 
Mix together all ingredients until well-blended, including the first half of the melted butter.  No kneading necessary, but I do mix it with my hands a bit towards the end.  It will be nice and sticky when mixed together.

Pour/scrape into a lightly-greased loaf pan (2 small loaf pans or one large) and bake in a preheated oven at 350 degrees for 30-40 minutes.

Halfway through baking, take the bread out of the oven and pour the rest of the melted butter on top.  You’ll know the bread is done when the top is golden with a bit of brown.  Remove from oven and serve warm.

************************

To me, the best part of this recipe is the fact that the bread is incredibly versatile.  You don’t have to knead it, you don’t have to let it rise and you can either make a sweet, breakfast bread by leaving out the cheese or a dusky, savory bread by using a darker beer (say, Shiner Bock or St. Arnold’s Amber) and an adventurous cheese.

Lately, I’ve been using finely grated sheep’s milk romano, which of course pairs nicely with the hearty bean and vegetable soups that I’ve been making to accompany the bread.  The romano is sharp and salty, which contrasts nicely with the sweetness of the sugar and the yeasty taste of the beer.  All in all, I’m quite a big fan of the romano cheese in the bread.

But there are also the good standbys: mild Cheddar and finely diced chives (about half a cup) make a delicious appetizer-style bread.  And Monterey Jack or Colby Jack with minced jalapeños makes a great Mexican-inspired bread, especially if you use Dos Equis or Tecate for the beer.  And you can always leave the jalapeño seeds out if you’re seeking flavor instead of fire.

Leave out the cheese entirely for a light, slightly crumbly bread that’s great to serve with jam and butter as a breakfast treat.  And if you use the cheapo beer (like Miller Light, which — normally — blech, but it’s okay here), there’s almost no taste of beer whatsoever — just a light, yeasty taste which is very refreshing and clean tasting.  So no one needs to know that you’re serving beer bread for breakfast!

Have fun, experiment and let me know what you come up with!  I’m always interested to see what concoctions people create out of this simple recipe.

Happy baking!

Even Homer Simpson Wouldn’t Drink This Stuff

Looking for an ice-cold beverage to quench your thirst on a hot, January day in Houston?

chelada.jpg

Ah…well…you might want to keep looking.

For the record, this is the newest offering from Anheuser-Busch: Chelada. It’s the latest mass-market attempt at cerveza preparada or Michelada (a.k.a. “red beer”), the rather disgusting recipe for which can be found here.

Here’s a hilarious sampling of recent reviews from the awesome BeerAdvocate:

  • “Occasionally I’ll take a sip and think it’s interesting, and that’s about the best thing I can say about it.”
  • “I’ve never had the misfortune of drinking a glass of fish blood, but I expect this is what it tastes like.”
  • “Flavor is so bad I can scarsely (sic) describe it. Pain. Fear. Agony. This is what cancer tastes like.”
  • “It had a very salty aftertaste, as I recall. I’m not 100% sure on the salty thing, though, because I’ve read that when a person has experienced severe trauma, the brain tries to protect itself by shutting down and blotting out the memory. So I might need a hypnotist to try and unlock some portions of the experience.”
  • “After taking a sip, I died a little inside.”

And they just get worse.

Hey, maybe this well sell like crazy in the Hispanic market. But somehow I think the AB product development team might have been, as one reviewer on BeerAdvocate said, “… hammered on tequila already…” when coming up with Chelada.